New Year   // gina

It is a new year. A new clean sheet. We are all capable of change, and now is as good a time as any. I feel that I need to change. Or rather, I need to change how I think.

I need to relax.

Life is not a test or competition. But I treat it like one. There will be no winner at the end. No prizes given to those who fit the most into their days and years. At the end we leave it all behind. One’s worth is not linked directly to how many hours of work they do, or how “productive” their days are. In reality there is no real measure of a person’s worth. Because, again, it is not a competition. Not an exam. Life is not the Leaving Certificate.

I cannot get an A in “life”.

Life is simply an experience. One in which we are blessed with a body that is amazing in its complexity, and a mind with truly incredible potential. And this body and mind enable us to feel a whole rainbow of sensations and emotions. Both the positive and the negative being experiences we should appreciate as things of wonder. We also have the magical capacity to form deep emotional and physical connections with those around us. To love and be loved. All while surrounded by a natural world that is beautiful on so many levels that words fail us.

Life is simply an experience. Of all of this.

Of course being what we are we have set rules and guidelines to follow. The “normal” path of life. What one should do. What is considered a good use of one’s life. Be productive. To-do lists. But I think often we miss the point. We rush towards tomorrow, towards next week, next year. Now is the point. This moment right NOW. The art of simply living, breathing, smelling and sensing the world around us. I need to remember that. And keep remembering it.

Yes life is short, even if right now we feel like we will be forever. But rushing and stressing do not make it last longer. The contrary. My worrying about wasting time, or not being productive enough, or with my fluctuating schedule not always having enough work yet to feel “worthwhile” or “worthy”…this is the waste of time. Waste of life. Yes, I will always keep trying to do my best, that is who I am and I can’t see that changing. But then I need to be able to pause and be happy with that. As it is. And remember that whatever the situation, it too shall pass. All things pass. Both the good and the bad.

It all flies past us regardless.

So my New Year’s resolution is this: To live with my eyes and my heart open. To always be good to those around me, friends and otherwise, sharing the beauty of this life. To relax and remember that I am not living an exam. I cannot get an “A”. And to pause…

…and simply breath.

Happy new year to you all.

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